Happy Wednesday everyone,
It’s been almost a year since I published my short story Selfish and it left off on a cliffhanger. Well I’ve finally found some motivation to write part two!
I want to explore black female entrepreneurs who’ve been putting themselves first, sometimes before anyone or anything else in their lives. Could this be a good thing? Is it self-care or just being plain selfish…
I named the story Selfish after the Slum Village song featuring John Legend and old Kanye. It had me thinking… most times single independent women especially ones with no immediate desire to start a family are often called Selfish. But is that true? Are we selfish and if so, is it a bad thing? Men are allowed to selfish why aren’t we?
Click here to read the first half of Selfish
Previously on Selfish
Since we arrived fashionably late, we made our way to the bar to get our drinks for the countdown. As Naimah was trying to flag down the bartender, I felt a hand grab me by the waist. I thought I was tripping but I knew that scent of cologne from anywhere. When I turned around I was met with the set of eyes that sent chills down my back. The DJ was warning everybody the countdown would begin soon but I was too busy stuck in a trace to even care. This can’t be…
I could barely keep it together. I just can’t believe after all this time he was here. Alex Copeland was standing here, in the flesh, in front of me. How is this possible? Well, it seems like life has been treating him good. He’s still fine as hell.
“Autumn, it’s been too long.” Alex said while leaning in for a hug.
“Alex. What are you doing here?” I said. That was the only thing I could think to say.
Naimah’s nosey ass, cleared her throat, “Here girl they’re starting to countdown.” As she handed me my drink.
For a brief moment I forgot we were in a crowded club on New Years Eve. Thank God someone brought me back to reality.
10… The countdown began
“Alex, these are my best friends Naimah and Kyle” I stood back in attempt to ease some of the tension between us.
“Nai, Kyle, this is Alex…”
“…We spent some time together during my stay in Brazil.” I was still trying to process everything that was happening.
“Nice to meet you ladies.” Alex said in his naturally relaxed tone. Both Kyle and Nai gave confused stares.
“Nice to meet you!” Kyle said while raising her glass in the air for the cheers.
“Hello Alex. You’re a long way from home aren’t you?” Naimah said while also raising her glass in the air. I can always count on her to get straight to the point.
I just stood there equally confused. Why was he here? Was he visiting? Was he here with someone?
We all raised our glasses.
“HAPPY NEW YEAR!!”
The club went wild. Confetti, streamers, and balloons were released from the sky. We all hugged in celebration of making it another year. As much as I want to grill Alex to figure out what is going on, I had to take this moment to celebrate with my girls. We made it through a rough year. We finally convinced Nai to come party with us! This is a Kodak moment so of course we had to take pictures. Most of the people here are CTA’s clients, partners, and colleagues. The media, bloggers, paparazzi and industry reps were dying to get photos of us.
After finally breaking away from the crowd that formed, I found Alex. Alex was indeed here with a group of his own. Interesting. Not only was he here with a group of people but he was sharing a New Years kiss with a mystery woman.
“Another round of drinks please bartender” I yelled over the blaring music.
Listening to Kyle cry about Lamar and the baby is getting old. Constantly getting stopped by the media asking about our Fashion Week projects is getting old. This is supposed to be a girls night out but it sure doesn’t feel that way. I mean I knew this was a work event but I thought the point of tonight was to have fun. I could be at home working because Lord knows there’s still so much to do.
Autumn is off her game tonight. I can tell it’s that guy from Brazil. I’m pretty sure her trip to Brazil was 3 years ago. What kind of hold could he possibly have on her because I’ve never seen her this quiet. We definitely need more drinks and to hit the dance floor right now! I did not get dragged out of the house to sit around and watch their drunk asses mope over men.
After the bartender hands us our 4th maybe 5th round of drinks it’s time to go party. I pull my girls on the dance floor and we start moving our bodies to one of our favorite Beyonce songs, ‘Get me bodied’.
“FUCK everything else we came here to have fun remember!” I yell as we toast and dance together.
Not too long after the song was over, we start really feeling our drinks and grinding to the music. This is the most fun I’ve had in a while. As my girls start dancing with some guys on the dance floor. I lock eyes with the cutie I saw at the bar earlier. Models, they get me every time. A tall slender, frame and those long legs truly are my weakness. Industry events are normally crawling with models anyway so no surprise here. Yet I was still intrigued by this one in particular.
We held eye contact the whole time she walked over. Intense.
“Naimah right?” the cutie from the bar asked me. I nodded while still moving to the beat. She hands me a comp card and whispers “Don’t be a stranger.” After watching her walk away, I look down and read her name Jasmine. Of course, she looks like a Jasmine.
“Yassss! Get it girl!!” I yell as Autumn twerked on some random dude.
This is exactly what I needed. Of course I miss my baby but mom deserves to have fun too. My sister sent me the cutest video of her dancing during the countdown and yelling “Happy New Year Mommy”. I hate that I feel so guilty every time I go out now. Why can’t I just have a worry-free night? Seems like Lamar has those every night.
I have no idea why he won’t stop texting me tonight of all nights but it is pathetic. My sister dates his best friend so if I had to guess he knows I went out with my friends tonight. Just like a man to try to throw salt in my game on girls night. I can’t front I do miss him but I deserve more. He’s not allowed to treat me any ole’ way and decide he’s ready to come back home when I’m ready to have my fun. Hell no.
Happy New Year baby.
I get it u’re mad. Idk y i’ve been actin like this. u deserve better. This year is going to be different. i promise. just don’t give up on our family baby
I was reading the messages Lamar sent trying to figure out if I wanted to reply, when I was interrupted by a handsome face. I think he was one of the guys I was just dancing with.
“Can I buy you a drink?” he said with a smile.
Incoming call: Lamar
Missed calls: Lamar (10)
“Sure” I smiled back. Why not? I looked back at my girls who were still getting their lives on the dance floor.
“Hey y’all I’ll be at the bar” My girls and I always make it a point to check in with each other.
“I’m Ian and you are?” He smiled again.
“I’m…. ugh… Kyle!” I laughed. I’m so bad at holding my alcohol. After a few drinks I suck at being smooth.
So you’re just going to ignore my texts and calls?
Incoming call: Lamar
Missed Calls: Lamar (25)
“You seem to be a busy woman Kyle.” Ian hands me my drink and points to my ringing phone.
“Not really. Thank you for the drink though.” I smiled
Ian and I stood at the bar for awhile getting to know each other better. He was actually an interesting guy. He went to school for Engineering and just moved to the Bay Area from Dallas, TX. He was ready for a change of scenery and I could totally relate. We were so wrapped into our conversation I didn’t notice it was almost 2AM.
“I think you owe me another dance.” Ian and that smile was giving me butterflies.
“Do I?” I tried to play coy but I was really feeling him.
“Cmon girl show me what you got.” He pulled me in the direction of the dance floor.
As we were starting to dance, I locked eyes with Lamar. He was headed in our direction. Shit.
I found the cover artwork on Pinterest by an artist name Nicholle Kobi.
I hope you all enjoyed the second installment of Selfish and I promise it will not take me a whole year to write the next part. Lol
My hope is that my readers grow to love Naimah, Kyle and Autumn. I wanted to create relatable characters who readers can see themselves in.
As Always Thanks for Reading & We’ll Talk Next Week!